unraveling the enigma...sorta
the AMAZING RACE! ahhhhhh. Now, it's time for my reality tv. If only the Mole 3 would come back with Andersen Cooper, tv viewing would be complete.
PhillyKat at 12:01:00 AM | I just realized I never blogged about Fame. It was fantastic. I love Debbie Allen. I have been a fan of hers since I was a little girl. I'm not sure exactly when I saw her first, but I know she was dancing. One of my earliest Debbie memories was when she played Michael Evans' prom date on Good Times.
Debbie will be Debbie and she will break yo face. Just ask Carnie Wilson as she lifted new face up off the desk. Carnie attempted, and I do say a-temp-ted to correct Ms. Debbie. You do not try to step on, over, or around Debbie Allen. I wish I remembered everything she said because Carnie tried 2x to speak over her and got shut up both times. "Oh no Ms Thing this is my time. You had your time. You didn't say anthing about potential." Debbie continued while Carnie sat there looking stupid. To quote Joey Fatone from *Nsync, "She told you." Everyone in the finals are Debbie's kids. She is the lioness and you will not speak ill about one of her cubs.
The group performances are 1000x better than American Idol (I only saw the first season but I feel safe in saying it was better than them too). Why? Cuz Debbie worked the hell out them kids. They came out like it was opening night on Broadway. Yeah, some of them aren't as adept at dancing at others, but they were adequate. They danced and sang live. I have yet to see Janet, Madonna, or Britney do that. So thumbs up!!!!
PhillyKat at 8:24:00 PM |
Check this:
I purchased online tickets on the 1st of April. On the 6th I received an email stating that they had been printed and mailed. On the 13th of May I emailed customer service inquiring about the ticket status and stated "I want the tickets or my money back. Waiting until 48hrs before the concert is unacceptable." Ticketmaster policy is we take your money immediately; you wait for what could amount to months for your ticket. On the 14th I recieved a reply from George that didn't address my email. It was just more tixmasta gobbleygok. I emailed them back on the 14th and have yet to receive a response.
Today, I called. Let me first say that customer service is obviously not a priority. Long story short, I didn't loose my cool...I was stern but cool..they did. Hee! Tomorrow, I will wait for the supervisor's supervisor to call me back. She actually offered me a solution I could deal with, but I really feel like fucking with them now! In case you don't know someone in customer service can be either your best or your worst customer. I bucking for infamy. Wish me luck!
PhillyKat at 7:37:00 PM |
I Don’t Wanna Be
by Gavin DeGraw
I don’t need to be anything other
Than a prison guard’s son
I don’t need to be anything other
Than a specialist’s son
I don’t have to be anyone other
Than the birth of 2 souls in one
Part of where I’m going
Is knowing where I’m coming from
Chorus:
I don’t wanna be anything other
Than what I been trying be lately
All I hafta do is think of me
And my peace of mind
I’m tired of looking round rooms
Wondering what I gotta do
Or who I’m supposed to be
I don’t wanna be anything other than me
I’m surrounded by liars
Everywhere I turn
I’m surrounded by imposters
Everywhere I turn
I’m surrounded by identity crisis
Everywhere I turn
All I only wanna know is
If I can be the only who’s learned
PhillyKat at 12:43:00 AM | I need to make some serious changes. *Heah* (sarcastic smirky sound) When, I started that sentence I was referring to my site, I'm iso a new layout, but as I finished typing 'serious,' I realized it should be overall change. I need a metamorphosis. My chrysalis no longer fits me. I'm tired of being held down by an invisible ceiling, gonna break that bitch. I'm tired of being forced back by that velvet rope. I'm a burn that muthafucka the next time it crosses my path. Then I'm going to rise up from it's ashes like a Phoenix. (Alright, did anyone just flash to Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets or is just me? Just me? Ah, alright, I'm used to that.)
I hold my self back. Man, I'm gonna kick my own ass. When the hell did I put on a straight jacket? Though, I'm sure a few people think I belong in one, I assure you I do not. I'm crazy, not insane! :D Hey, that sounds like a good title for something or other. I need to get off my ass and just do it. Well, I want to move west (NV OR AZ), so I need to get motivated. I want to learn script writing, so I need to get motivated. Hell, judging by the lack of good movies coming out of Hollyweird, they need new ideas. (Problem: I hate Hollyweird. And y'all wonder what kind of conundrums I have. Sheesh!) To quote Gavin DeGraw "I don't wanna be anything other than me." I'm wasting away. I refuse to be refuse. (I'll wait while you get your dictionary. Can't find it? Go to Merriam Webster. You with me? Good. Let's dance.)
It's time to rock people. It's time to get things moving. No one is getting younger and no one should waste away. So, let's make a pack, you and me, let's pledge to go for it. You see a guy or girl you like, step up and be heard. Find your voice. TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU: If you don't tell a person you like them, chances are they don't know. If it's one thing I hate, it's a guy I've known forever coming up to me with a wedding band on telling me how they use to like me. Nigga please. WTF am I supposed to do about that now? You wanna write, then fucking write. How you gonna be a writer if your ass never writes anything gatdamnit!? You wanna sing, then fucking sing. Move it out the shower baby. Move it out the shower. You wanna dance, then put yo gatdamn dancing shoes on and make like Fred Astaire, Nuryev, Fosse with a hint of Missy thrown in! Getch you some blisters! You wanna go to school or back to school, fucking go! Let the kids help you with your homework. Just make like a Nike campaign and just do it. Deal?
God, it's fucking fantastic to have Debbie Allen back on television. That woman motivates me like no other!
PhillyKat at 11:57:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 12:58:00 AM | I am broken. I don't know if I can be fixed. There's no wire disconnected, no blown circuit or fuse, no broken switch. I'm just broken. There's something missing. I think something that went undeveloped during my gestation. Or possibly it was supposed to be nurtured and grow as I did in my childhood through smiles, hugs & kisses, parental support, the sound of mom & dad saying "I love you." Or maybe, just maybe, it was supposed to grow through the self reliance and assurance taught during childhood. Here's the thing, I didn't grow up with Mike and Carol Brady as my parents. There weren't conversations in my house. There was yelling. There was fussing. There was abuse. There was fear and intimidation. There was complaining and the ever-so-popular "I'll give you something to cry for," or "Dummy," or "Ugly," but no "I love you."
I wrote something not to long ago called I Don't Know How to Say I Love You. In it I say because I never learned. I was serious. Everything I know about healthy relationships, love, et al I learned from spying on other people, living vicariously, reading, and daydreaming. In other words, I don't know jack. Wish that I did. I would love to, but I don't. And the older I become, the less likely I will ever learn. I will stay broken. Chances are a single man in my age a) is damaged, b) thinks all single women play games, c) is gay, d) is broken in his own unique way, e) is a combo, or f) has some kind of damage that surpasses even my imagination. At any rate, he probably will not have the patience needed to understand me.
Whatever the issue with him might be, it doesn't matter. It doesn't negate the fact that I'm broken and without extra pieces or instruction. I've come along way in repairing myself, but there's only so far I can go without a 3rd or 4th shoulder to lean on, 2 arms to fall into, and a chest to lay my head on. So, there ya go. No love life. No child. No instructions. No pieces. Nothing. I'm just broken.
PhillyKat at 11:17:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 6:12:00 PM | My blogger template is back but some of my code was changed. *rolleyes* I am perturbed. My template code is as it was back in March but my site is not showing it. This is ridiculous.
PhillyKat at 5:04:00 PM | I am such a spud russet. Amazing Race 3 starts this Thursday and I can not wait. I'm almost giddy with anticipation. *sigh* I need something more.
PhillyKat at 11:58:00 PM |
I'm not feeling well today. It has been cold and rainy. Everyone laughs at me, but as far as I am concerned summer came in February and ended in April in Philadelphia (with intermittent cold days). The weather now is, man I dunno, fall like. I wouldn't be phased one bit if it snows in July. Truly, I wouldn't.
PhillyKat at 8:38:00 PM | I've finished reading the last 5 entries of SourBob and I think I see what has prompted his self revelation and subsequent retirement. I think perhaps he realized something he didn't want to know about women. A woman can be nastier, sneakier and more vicious than any man she's pitted against. And that's without effort. A woman on a mission is unstoppable.
If you clicked the link and read the entry, here's something you should know about women, a woman will attack a man. I mean beat on him, kick him, declare all out physical war all the while daring him to hit her back so she can call the police or destroy his character. Two of my 3 ex (thank god) sister-in-laws attacked and almost killed 2 of my brothers. One tried to stab my brother and when she couldn't she sliced up his arm. She was a nurse, so she knew exactly where to strike. He has like 80-85% mobility in the arm. The other hid behind a door and when my brother came in she attacked him with a frying pan. The first one is actually certifiably insane (no really I'm serious). The other is just an evil little imp that I could do without.
PhillyKat at 9:31:00 PM |
I do understand why. And, if truth be told, am a tad bit jealous. You see, SB has come to a realization, an understanding within himself at the ripe old age of 27 that I am not only envious of but desire. Not only does he know that "All I have to do is quit bitching and do the work" he's doing it.
So, my hat's off to you SB, happy travels. Cheers!
PhillyKat at 8:28:00 PM |
2. What brand of toilet paper do you prefer? Um, a soft one but not too thick. i like kleenex but they don't make it anymore. charmin bought them...not as good, but sitll better than Scotts. Hate Scotts.
3. What brand(s) of shoes do you wear? i wear fit'ems and like'ems. don't care who they're by if i like 'em and they fit, i'll wear 'em. i have no brand affiliation for shoes.
4. What brand of soda do you drink? none really. mostly Goya or 305 seltzer/spritzers from whole foods
5. What brand of gum do you chew? again i really don't chew gum. maybe doublemint
PhillyKat at 1:15:00 AM | Yeah I know the bg is busy. Deal with it. I'm so ticked. Netfirms refuses to play well with almost every layout I like. It's ridiculous. But, I'll deal. Why? Cuz it's free and I have hella space. That's why. Blame me? I think not
I've been awakening with movies in my head again. They're so clear. It's like I'm there. I just never know what is being said when I awake. I still see the ending scene of this last one. I think it was called The Letter. John Tuturro or someone like him was on a roof top to a 2 or 3 story house. He was in a lawn chair and I think there was an empty one. There was some sort of small table or large cooler. It was set up like a beach scene almost. I think the first floor was a store front. He was reading a letter printed on what looked like rice paper stationary..very thin. It was from a woman. I remember it was beautiful. A kiss off or explaination or something, but beautiful. He put his arm up, letter in hand, and let the wind take it. *pull back que end theme fade to black run credits* I woke up. Apparently, this woman he loved was not what she appeared to be. She had a double or perhaps triple life. One of these lives had something to do with Gene Hackman or Anthony Hopkins. I'm not sure which was in my head. I tend to switch back and forth between the 2 when I'm in need of an actor of their caliber. I certainly wish I remembered more of that dream.
I laid in bed wallowing in self pity again this morning. Started thinking about my childhood and things that have happened. I must learn to see/think about things from the past without re-experiencing it. I have trouble with that. That hurt little girl rules me. Little bitch! Fear and a hurt little girl. Yep, I'm a catch. Who wants somma me? *roll eyes at my damn self* What I need to do is write it down, but I don't know if I'm strong enough for that. I don't have that many decades under my belt. Maybe when I'm 50.
I've got nothing else to say, so I'm out. No, I do wanna make one observation. What kind of ego do we online journal keepers have to think people wanna read the craziness that goes through our minds? I have done far better at keeping this journal than any other I have ever started that no one has read. I feel guilty if I don't post something daily like I'm letting you down. Most you people don't even leave comments......you could sign the guestbook though. I know you're out there. I have site meter. I see you. One day you need to say hi, bonjour, g'day, or w/e you say.
Oh and to all you people who are iso Marsupalami lyrics....I posted them back in March sometime. I'm sorry that I keep coming up under cartoon lyric searches. *sigh* If Marsupalami was so dang popular, I wonder why it didn't even last a full season? Oh, well. Here are all the lyrics I remember: Hoo Marsupalami got me running through the jungle/Got a tale to tell you/ Have a swinging time/Say Hooba Hoooo Marsupalami
Peace Out!
PhillyKat at 11:56:00 PM | I'm going to post some goals I want accomplished by this time next year. I'm going to post them as they come to me so order be damned
Goal: Loose weight. Fuck society! I don't like it. There, how's that Mo'Nique? Girlfriend must be hella short cuz she claims she's only 220lbs. Jigga wha?
Goal: Meet a guy that I actually like and vice versa. That translates into reel in the trust issues in case you're wondering.
Goal: Write a story from begining to end. Not a treatment. Not an idea. Not a line or 3. But a complete full story. Even if it's utter and complete garbage.
Goal: Be happy!
Decided to edit and post what I'm looking for in a man just in case you guys know anyone. So, in no particular order, here goes:
The List:
Loving - i think that self explanatory. oh, he's gotta be able to show it, but not be all touchy feely all the time.
Kind - a good guy. doesn't mean wimpy or boring. just caring
Intelligent - i'm no stephen hawking, but i'm no slouch either. if he can't hold a convo or form/voice his own opinions, he can step.
Great Sense of Humor - can not be with someone who can not see the humor in things. so, he's gotta have a s.o.h., he'll be pummeled.
Witty - if he's intelligent w/a soh, he's probably witty. it doesn't hurt to make sure.
Honest - i really mean honest! i hate a liar. also, can accept the truth. most men say they want a truthful woman, but when they meet one they rather have a game player. i don't have time for games if they're not by milton bradley, parker brothers, etc.
Temperment - even. i'm moody with a hot temper (though it dies down quickly). shouldn't be 2 of us.
Straight - not in the closet. not bi. not bi-curious. but a heterosexual! i catch u bending over, your ass is dead, esp if i wind up with a disease.
Faithful - yeah, read that dead part above. i think i probably would have some leadway for someone in a career where groupies gather, as long as he knows a) the only thighs worn as earmuffs are mine, b) let her get on her knees and stay there, c) need to get laid? call me!
Personality - a good one..obviously. not someone who's always hype or nervous, but not always laid back like he's on a permanent canubis high. just a nice mix between the 2. protective but not overly...knows people need their space. someone who doesn't feel the need to fill up all the quiet w/conversation. understands the need for contemplation, meditation, relaxation, and the all important 'me' time. likes a good hug. able to stop and see the beauty around him. not jealous of male friends.
The Physical:
Looks: Attractive. what? i'm not gonna lie. i've told u guys before, my family will break the will of an ugly man. slice and dice
Height: taller than me and i'm 5'9". prefereably 6' to 6'3"
Build: i dun really care. shit, look at the celebs i'm attracted to. george clooney, ice cube (mah baybay), timberlake! i'm all over.
Hair: no type of processing. if its naturally curly, it had better still be. brunette preferably.
Makeup: none! i've never been attracted to prince, michael jackson, marilyn manson, or eddie izzard.
Piercings: 2 earrings alright but not a body full of piercings
Tattoos: let's just say i'm not interested in the incredible tattooed man.
Kissable: self explanatory. me likey the suckable lips.
Jeez, I am picky. Oh well!
I'm sure you've noticed that I did not mention money or job. That's because I really don't care. I want someone who has time for me so if his career is all encompassing, he probably doesn't want me. If he can manage his life and his career, then yea me! Y'all know travel is fine, as long as he doesn't mind if I pop-up from time to time cuz I'm a travel ho as you know.
PhillyKat at 7:57:00 PM |
edit: 6 hrs and 10 mins later.....
Well, I'm not in jail, but don't hold out hope. Suffice it to say, something incredibly stupid and illegal happened, and I've been just waiting for her to say something so I can cut her. Unfortunately, she's not that stupid. Plus, Tia said I couldn't kill her 'til she had some money for bail.
PhillyKat at 1:33:00 PM | Alright let me explain yesterday. I said yes to working the polls today. TODAY! Today, the last first run episode of Buffy: the Vampire Slayer. Me! The person with the broken vcrs! How bloody stupid can I get. I swear. I'm praying for a tape to come my way.
I had something else I wanted to say, damned if I know what the hell it was. Oh well.
*** 2 Minutes later ***
Nice dip in the pool
Put your paws up! Put 'em up!
PhillyKat at 9:43:00 PM | My dear friends,
I am an idiot.
Love,
Enigma
PhillyKat at 10:54:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 7:35:00 PM | YOU GOTTA SEE THIS NEW VIDEO. Check it out.
PhillyKat at 10:31:00 PM |
We got to the cemetary and it was hideous. The owners have obviously changed. It has not been kept up the way it should have been at all. My father and mother aren't together. (Don't ask) My mom is in the supposed new section. There were wild geese all over that section. Wild geese and wild goose shit on peoples graves and grave markers. It was appalling. Funny thing, it was all around my mom's but not on my mom's plot. Like they knew better or had been shoed away. Or, like someone had cleaned it off maybe. I dunno.
Hope this doesn't sound morbid, but I had fun. lol
*********
This is a cp of a convo between shelby and myself about a picture she linked to me. The picture was just too sad.
shelby: oh this is the gayest gay that ever gayed: SEE THE PIX
kat: oh god. my hand flew to my mouth. i look like i smelled something that stinks
shelby: lmao
kat: k i was wondering y jc arm is so flickded (lol) and its justin's. chris looks like he groping a breast
kat: lance's breast
shelby: lmfao
kat: and he look like he should have a pai. good god he gay!
shelby: bwahehehehehehehe is what i juss did
kat: they all look like young kids having a good time xcpt for chris who looks like he's up to something and lance who looks like its a sexual fantasy come true. "noooooo pull the ropes tighter! jc get cloooossssssser"
kat: lmao @ u
shelby: oh god u killin me
kat: i mean j look at him! he's ready to drop trow and bend over
shelbys: lmfao
kat: now that i look more at it, po po look like he trynta push lance off w/o actually touching him. like he using the bottom of his hand...must keep fingers away lest he show up in my room again
shelby:lmao
kat: and look at his face. he aint happy. he knew that shit was gay
kat: i wonda who roomed w/whom.
shelby: no one wanted to room w/ lance after that shoot
kat: if lance and jc roomed together........right! .......u know they are CLOSE
kat: ooooooouuuuuuuuu j..........lance look like timmy from passions. tell me i'm lying.
shelby: lmao. omg he dooooes
kat: k i just cracked my shit up
shelbys: ok i gotta close that pic out
kat: k and jc look like a girl with that fake head tilt saying "no stop. we can't" "tee hee no lance"
shelby: (emoticon)
kat: pathetic. thats fucking kiddie porn. where's justin shirt? somebody shoulda taken custody! lol
shelby: (emoticon)
kat: sike i c it. but its hard to see. joey & chris got vests. how f'n gay porn is that (neva seen one but i'm sure they wear vests. just look at lance....and his is open and inviting). ohhhh the photographer should be shot!
shelby: STOOOOOOOOOP
kat: i can hear him now w/a lisp.....*suck teef* ok boysth. here'sth the sitch. *suck teef* we gon wraps ewwwwe in wope *suck teef* and *suck teef* yall gon hafta struggles to get out. mmmmm kay *suck teef* nah, lets getchu and ewwwe in da front *suck teef* o i know.....*suck teef* letsth getchu in da middle mmmmmmm hmmmmmm and open up da vest. mmmm dis will be fierce *snap*
shelby: "yall gon hafta struggles to get out. mmmmm kay " roflmfao
shelby: lmao..our theme song! http://incredible.nu/dorks/stuff/bored.shtml
AND THAT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN IS WHAT HAPPENS TO 2 INTELLIGENT WOMEN WHEN THEY ARE BORED SHITLESS ON THE NET!!!!!!! k, mostly me, since j was laughing too much type but trust me.....it's indicative.
PhillyKat at 6:24:00 PM | Feeling a little pissed off. Not entirely sure why. I know what I think, but I hate to admit thats it. Anyway, everything I feel like typing comes out snarky or downright bitchy. You know I think it's a culmination of things..emotions.
Tomorrow my siblings (all but 1) and I are suppose to go to the cemetary where my parents and my Nana (paternal grandmom) are buried. I am no fan of cemetaries. I do not like to walk amongst grave markers. (I was about to say the dead, but I do that daily.) I honestly feel that visiting graves is a little simpleminded if you're going to go there to be close to your love one. What makes people think that the spirit of the dead hang around in a park for the dead instead of places where their family/friends gather or places they once loved? I dunno. I don't get it. I wasn't going, but I've changed my mind for 2 reasons: a) I wanna make sure the perpetual upkeep for the graves is being done since I paid alot for it, and b) I don't wanna hear any bullshit about my not going. (Wow! After I finished re-reading this the Daytime Emmys did their memoriam section. Talk about timing!)
I am freezing. I don't know if I'm in need of some serious iron or if it's the weather. Lemme ck. You wait here. (less than a minute later) Daaaang! Isn't it May? It's 50F, but it feels like 44. And it's raining. Tha hell? May showers bring June flowers? I may put my timbs on tomorrow. Shiiiiit, not gonna wear any shoes or my sneaks up in a cemetary if it's raining. As it stands I'm wearing jeans and I don't care what anyone thinks.
PhillyKat at 10:11:00 PM |Friday 5
1. What drinking water do you prefer -- tap, bottle, purifier, etc.? distilled
2. What are your favourite flavor of chips? plain (ruffle cut), low or no salt,
3. Of all the things you can cook, what dish do you like the most? hmmmm.....does hot cereal count? me likey cereal. i8! i8! eggplant parm
4. How do you have your eggs? under my chicken. i very rarely eat them and when i do they hafta be full of stuff so i forget that its chicken ovum. basically an omelette (garbage can omelette...everything in it..almost). I like cheese (not spose to eat it); sauteed onions (lots), sweet peppers, spinach, and maybe some sprouts; plus extras if i feel like crumbled up bacon (soy)
5. Who was the last person who cooked you a meal? How did it turn out? cooked me a meal...full meal? oh well mouf made me an omelette last week i think. it was good.
PhillyKat at 1:10:00 AM | I've been remiss in the sharing of the fun. So, please accept this as a token of my apologies. It's a snarky article regarding the baldness of hip hop. Enjoy!
PhillyKat at 11:06:00 PM |
The so-called modified exercises for anyone with a bad back or neck are bullshit! There are exercises that NEEEEED modification that don't have any. Oh and the gatdamn director sucks. The instructor is telling you to watch girlie for modification but the damn director rarely ever cuts to her. I've got my own modifications ...somewhere between their mods and the normal.
I really don't see how this is working my abs. I keep them tight (for the most part), but it still all seems like leg work, which I don't mind. Legs are the largest muscles in the body and by working them you will loose, but I want too FEEL it. Now, what will be funny is if I can't even roll over on my side tomorrow morning. Alright, maybe not as funny as painful, but that'll learn me.
PhillyKat at 10:15:00 PM | Changed the music files on here (natch) and on the main page
PhillyKat at 10:40:00 PM |
I was yelling at the instructor today (mind you she's on tape), too. She's all hold on to your ankles and I'll be like 'bitch, I can't reach my ankles do u see these damn breasts' (not to mention the belly)! She keeps saying get tight into a ball. I ain't been able to get like that since I left b cups.
I'm tired of exercise tapes showing Mr & Ms. "Perfect" Body. These muthafukas don't sweat and it is annoying as hell, especially when you all drippy wishing you had got worked out rolling around with somebody (or under somebody) if you feel me. You know what I want to see? Fat people! Fat people working out! Seriously. I don't want to see them jumping up and down or sweatin' to the oldies, but doing things like pilates. Honestly, what I prefer is the instructor alone doing the workout with you like Tony Little or Billy Blank. If they must have demonstrators, I'd like to see people at different levels: beginning (fat person....not some bia that is whining over 5-20 pounds, but a heavster! or atleast make it someone struggling.), intermediate (the whiney), and expert (bring on the models & dancers). The chick in the front is so obvious a dancer. She's a dancer or a circus freak. She has a dancer's feet...ugly. I look at her and think "You can kick that leg but you have horse hooves for feet!"
Holy shit! This ain't intermediate. It's accelerated. No wonda. I'm going to try it anyway. I just won't do what I can't do and I won't care. I'll hold off on adding in the target training. If tomorrow you get an entry that reads, "waaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh," accelerated
dun kicked my ever loving ass and I've dragged myself to the tub of warm water and epsom salt.
PhillyKat at 4:56:00 PM |
Some jerk answers saying your tickets were mailed on the 3rd. If I don't have them, let them know 48hrs from the date and I can pick them up at the box office. Tha hell? How do they know if that is going to be convenient for me? I told them it was not. Did that fool even read my damn email. First of all, finding out that they were mailed on the 3rd makes me even angrier. Secondly, he didn't address what I said. Plus, what makes them think I am attending the event? Just because you buy something does not mean, you're going to be the one using it. So, I've emailed them again saying 'I want my tickets now or my money.' Let's see what they say to that.
PhillyKat at 12:47:00 AM | Wow! No, posts from me in a few days. I certainly haven't been busy I don't think. I've been in the dumps. I need to find a job. I'm afraid I will have to go to retail.....GOD I HATE RETAIL......even if only p/t. The bills won't wait. I've been very very weepy and scared.
Tonight, I answered my first online ad. I was scared, lol. I don't know why but I was. The ad was a telecommuting ad (work from home). I was going to post my resume on monster.com again, but it went wacko on me. I held off on that for a bit. I'll just keep (ok is anyone else tired of the Matrix infused commercials or is it just me?) searching.
I'm seriously thinking about setting up a site and begging people for money. I probably have missed the end of the fiscal year for most
people and orgs, but I still might try it. My student loan is a compounding exponentially. I have past due balances and I'm not use to it. You guys thought I was joking about starting a porn site for big breast lovers but it's starting to sound alright. I can set up a corner of my house and just have some big tittied mamas come in for pix. Maybe I can set up a live webcam. I'd sit here typing topless. lol
Alright, you know the lol was bullshit cuz that's sounding like a good idea at about right now.
As you can tell, I AM NOT HAPPY NOR USE TO BEING BROKE.
edit: Alright this weekend certainly was a blur, not only didn't I realize that I had blogged this weekend, I dunno wth I was on about. Sweet Mary! Next time I'm just gonna nap.
PhillyKat at 12:02:00 AM | I just got finished listening to Amerie's version of "I'm Coming Out" originally done by Diana Ross. It sent me running for Diana. Trust me that is not something I do lightly. Cain't stand me some Diana. But her version is infinitely better than Ameries.
Shrink had somebody's version of "Good Love" on his blog. *smacking lips* Meh. It left a bad taste in my mouth. That's my favorite Anita Baker song. Blasphemy!
And who was it a few years ago thought it was a good idea to remake an Angela Bofill song? Who authorizes these things? Certainly not me. And why I'm asking about authorization, I've always wondered what posesses Prince to let 2nd rate (if that good) singers remake his songs. I think that man be high sometimes, yo. I really do.
*sigh* Why won't people leave good songs alone? If they wanna remake a song, why don't they try something that they can easily make theirs like a track off a LaToya Jackson lp?
edit: i8 I just gave (attempted anyway) Amerie's version another listen because I realize since she showed up at the Soul Train Awards in her lingerie my opinion of her has soured. Shit, let's be real, it molded! Anyway, my conclusion is, this bia can not sing. Woooo lawd!
PhillyKat at 2:05:00 AM | WARNING: Rambling Bitchfest Below
When famous multi-millionaires go too far, is anyone there to say "Enough is enough?"
This is my opinion mind you, but famous people go a little nuts, especially when they try to spread their wings. Granted some do turn into good actors llike David Bowie, but some just fizzle like Shaq. I guess I'm wondering why do models, athletes, actors and singers all want to do each others jobs?
What kind of ego must you have to think just because your at the top of your game singing (or god forbid modeling), you can put your ass in front of a camera and act? Unless you've had training (lots and lots of training) and acted before becoming a famous singer or model, stop taking jobs away from real actors. How thick do you think Madonna's head really is? When is she going to realize what the rest of the world knows. Ma, sweetie, love ya, but YOU CAN NOT ACT. If you must persist in your folly, think ensemble sweetie. Think supporting cast/bit player. You are sooooo not a leading lady.
And actors........STOP SINGING!!!! Keanu, gah! Russell Crow, double gah! And now Collin Farrell!! Sweet Mary! Alright alright if the role calls for singing and if they can carry a tune (or should I say toon), let them go ahead. But I'm sorry, no one should have to sit through Vin Diesel trying to sing. He admitted he can't. Guys & Dolls deserves better than that. Yes, Brando was in the original, but fuckin' hell he's fuckin' BRANDO man! You, Vin Diesel, are no Marlon Brando. (I just saw a commercial for The Guardian season finale. Who the hell is watching that show? I wanna know. Who? Agh!) I hope if Hollywood should decided to make another musical, they find actors that can really sing and dance (a la Catherine Zeta-J) or singers/dancers that can act (ummm......thinking....alright all I can think is Joe Fatone). And Hollywood, if you do cast Vin Diesel and Nicole Kidman, go to broadway for your supporting cast. Or maybe Joe and ummmmm Mandy Moore. Agh! For god's sake, the entertainment industry is in trouble.
The age of the all around entertainer is gone I fear. I sat here trying to think up some all around entertainers (that are good not just passable). Dude, they were all 50+. I think the youngest was Gregory Hines. I know someone is reading this thinking Janet is good. No, she isn't. Her acting is passable bordering on alright (no pun intended), but I still maintain, and will stick to it 'til my dying day, Janet can't dance. If you can't freestyle, if you can't just groove to the music without choreography, your ass can't dance. That's just the bottom line. Some of y'all may think Jenny Lo. To you I say, Ha! That bia can't sing and you know it. Monetary success doesn't equal talent. All you "oh if Aaliyah was still alivers" take advice from Justin Timberlake and cry me a river why don't 'cha!
Since I mentioned Justin and Joey, let's talk *Nsync, shall we. Joey was on the stage prior to *Nsync and from what a friend told me, he was great in Rent, so keep up the good work Joe! While you're at it, try out for the Nathan Detroit (played by Frank Sinatra in the 1955 movie) role in G&D. People, they really do need to start putting people who can sing in these movies! Justin, boo, if you're going to start acting (which I'm doubting since you seem to be really into the whole host/interviewer thing. next time Letterman is out, you're in buddy, but I digress), I hope you are taking lessons. Disney kids need help too. Didn't Britney's movie teach you anything? Speaking of Disney kids, JC, classes my love, classes. Chris doesn't act. YOU GO BOY! And Lance. Lance, Lance, Lance.......who told you that turning the The Great Gatsby into musical was a good idea? Furthermore, who told you that you should star in it? Four movies your producing? 4! Are you acting in them all? AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! Boy, your head is truly in the sky isn't it? Well, at least if you fall, you're closer to good old mother Earth than you would be in space. Oh, you'll still die, but at least maybe you're family will have some pieces they can bury or cremate or whatever you're people do. Don't get me wrong, Lance, I wish you success. I just think you need better idea people. Gimme a call boo.
My dear readers, you may be wondering what drove me to this. A number of articles and one death over the last few weeks have just made famous people irk. It began with Mtv's plans of turning Wuthering Heights into a musical starring 2 actors that have never sung out of the shower and/or Kareoke bar. Is nothing sacred! What's next? Gone With the Wind hip hop style starring 50cent, Nelly, and Missy? They can rename it Same Shit Dif Day, or Ret ta Bizounce, or something equally as idiotic. Oh, and the death was that of actress and singer, Lynn Thigpen. Today's episode of The District was a memorial to her. I started thinking about talent and viola! You would probably know Lynn from her role as The Chief from that Carmen Sandiego kids show.
*sigh* I'll quit here. Gonna go back to my book now.
edit: Apparenly JC knows his job. Apparently, before he went into the studio to record the song for Drumline, he was reading scripts. Something Dallas Austin said to him made him think: "And I kind of went home and looked myself in the mirror and was like, 'Dude, you're not an actor. I don't know what you're thinking with that pile of books and stuff like that over there.' I do that stuff to take my mind off of doing music, but at the end of the day I want to be in the studio. I had to look myself in the face and go, 'You can do TV shows, but remember that's not what you do for a living, dude. You do records for a living.' "
PhillyKat at 10:58:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 7:50:00 PM | 1. Would you consider yourself an organized person? Why or why not?
no. because i'm not
2. Do you keep some type of planner, organizer, calendar, etc. with you, and do you use it regularly?
no and no. well i do have a palm but i use it as a phone book and memo pad
3. Would you say that your desk is organized right now?
o hell no
4. Do you alphabetize CDs, books, and DVDs, or does it not matter?
yes to cds. no where to store dvds so they're just stacked as are books.
5. What's the hardest thing you've ever had to organize?
my life and i'm not doing it very well
PhillyKat at 12:33:00 AM | Embrace your boredom. I just said that to myself. Why in heaven's name would anyone want to do that? I truly must be slipping off my nut. I need to go back to my job search. It's not like I haven't had a job search engine open for ......oh....3 to 4 hours now. To quote Scarlett O'Hara, "I'll do it tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day." Yes, I know, tomorrow never comes, but isn't it fun to wait for? The idea of a fresh clean palette to start anew is refreshing, isn't it? I think so. No, I have not been sniffing clue. But, oh, the cherry scented marker is divine.
Today, was my 2nd day of pilates. My biceps (or triceps...never could remember which muscle group is which) and my abs hurt. That is so shocking to me. Crunches don't do that. My legs are fine though. (I've always had strong legs.) I'm thinking either I didn't do them correctly or that I need to supplement. I was going to do 2 day pilates and 2 day Tony Little workout(I have his tapes from before he started with the Gazelle). Now, I'm thinking Mari Winsor Pilates supplemented with Target Training for the legs. If I should happen to kill myself, please send all donations and condolences to: OH She was a Dumbass, c/o Kiss My Beige Ass, Philadelphia PA.
PhillyKat at 11:47:00 PM | Well damn, how 'bout all this time, I didn't realize I was taking kiddie quizzes. Oops sorry.....teeny bopper quizzes. lmao. I knew something was a miss, but I guess I just really didn't care. That's part of the boredom thing. I'm going to queendom.com where I belong. Why queendom? Because for the life of me I can not remember the addresses to any of the other quiz sites. Damn, why didn't I go through my favorites and write down the site addresses? Why, Lord why? *rhetorical* [Florida Evans impersonation]Damn. Damn! Damn!!!!![/fei]
Feh, I'm too bored to read. Gonna finish watching Princess Mononoke and maybe watch Clerks. Oh who am I kidding? I'm going to bed. Maybe I'll take Justin with me. It's been awhile since he and I laid together in the quiet. Since he whispered sweet melodies in my ear. Since he stroked my hair and kissed my lips, while parting my........oh I am sooooooo bored.
rofl.....Had y'all going though, didn't I?
PhillyKat at 11:00:00 PM |
As you have probably guessed, I'm at the survey stage of my boredom. Well, I better get on with it.
How Daring Are You?
Brave Little Toaster
Props for being brave and pushing the limits! Sure, you might not be the person who raises his or her hand first for skydiving lessons, or tries a different dish on each visit to that Indian restaurant. But you know what it means to be scared of something and do it anyway -- and you know that sometimes that can reward you, and other times kick your butt a little.
39% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.
PhillyKat at 10:29:00 PM |
Surprise! You're human.
Almost no one's willpower is perfect. Temptation comes in a jillion forms and if you're human, sometimes you give in to it. It's not even like that's an awful thing: sometimes that's what life is about. We forgive you, but now that you know, you could always, you know, try harder. When it really matters.
39% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.
PhillyKat at 10:12:00 PM |
Super Mind-Reading Skills
We can't say for sure whether your mind-reading powers would come from some mystical force, or maybe just from sheer intuition, but in the Flipside Super Universe, that's what we think you'd have. And that's nothing to be trifled with. First, you'd be able to predict the next step in some Super Villain's dastardly plan by looking at their face. But even more importantly, you'd be able to figure out whether that Super Cutie is flirting with you, or just being friendly.
only 4% of the people got the same result
PhillyKat at 9:55:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 1:28:00 AM | I didn't realiz it was May until today. Really, I did. I knew what month it was, but it wasn't registering. I guess that's because April flew. The reason it hit me because I realized it was the 5th, which means what would have been my dad's 80th birthday (yep, my parents had me LATE) passed. His birthday was the 2nd. Usually, I become melancholy and don't realize why, but this year wasn't the case. I realized last year things were affecting me less emotionally last year. I must say, I am pleased. Not that I forgot his birthday because I didn't. I'm pleased because I didn't realize it was coming let alone upon me. I'm hoping the same thing will happen on the 23rd of August (my mother's birthday).
I read something very funny today that I'd like to share. It was about a test of wills. A test to see who is the better male. Or, as SourBob put it, who is the man and who is the pussy.
PhillyKat at 11:56:00 PM | I changed the audio file on my main page too. See that navi box on the right? See where it says back to main? CLICK IT!!!
I added 2 buttons. One introducing you to the mind of Damon. The other to End of January, a Justin Timberlake site.
I also added Fear to my Wandering Mind section.
PhillyKat at 10:44:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 5:31:00 PM | I tried to blog again. Everything I start comes out as a scribble. What is a scribble? You would probably call them poems. I don't. They don't follow any form or meter that I learned. They follow my own timing. My own thoughts. My own speech. They are pieces of me, be they made up or pure reality, and I have never fit any pre-made mold.
I've got so much crap floating in my head it's scarey...stories, movies, videos, tv shows, even advertisements. All for my entertainment alone. One day I'll get them down maybe. One day.
Private Death
PhillyKat at 10:31:00 PM |
edit:
Loss for Words
PhillyKat at 9:41:00 PM | I've decided not to recant my NYC/Brooklyn experiences from Wednesday. Basically because the memories are fading (not really but I'd miss the funny bits like singing "Good Ship Lollipop" walking down Dey Street in line looking like we were in a parade or doing the bunny hop).
Today was very warm. I spent the entire day in the street somewhere between Philadelphia and Newark, DE. It wasn't a good day for driving because the crazies were out in full force. I-95 goes by the stadiums in south Philadelphia. The traffic was horrendous because Good Charlotte (ew) is performing tonight.
Last night, well between midnight and 1 am this morning, I was doing Friday Five. Blogger and/or iex went haywire on me and nothing posted. I'm going to retry eventually.
[edit: a good 2 hrs lata]
Friday 5:
1. Name one song you hate to admit you like.
"Look At Me" by Geri Halliwell
2. Name two songs that always make you cry.
"A Friend of Mine" by Ray Charles (not as much as it used to). I don't have a 2nd. Music rarely makes me cry.
3. Name three songs that turn you on.
Most songs that are meant to turn people on, don't do a thing for me...I rarely think they're sexy. Anyway this took a bit of looking.
"Worthy Of" by Justin Timberlake
"I Get Lonely" by Janet Jackson
"Melt With You" by Prince
4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
"Lovely Day" by Bill Withers
"Sunshine On a Rainy Day" by Emma Bunton
"What I Am" by Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians
"Everybody's Got Their Something" by Nikka Costa
honorable mention: "No Rain" by Blind Melon,
5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
"Words" by Madonna
"Why Don't You Do Right" by Peggy Lee
Shubert's (I think) "Danse Macabre"
"Don't Play Me" by Prince
"Dream On" by Aerosmith
*at any given moment 1, 3, 4, 5 can change instantly*
PhillyKat at 10:20:00 PM | All day today I meant to type up yesterday's NYC's experience. But being that I am Queen of the Procrastinators, I did not. Shelby posted this majorly long survey. I've decided to do some if not most of it since this blog is supposed to aid in my unraveling. So, here goes.
Full Name: Puddintame. Ask me again, I'll tell you the same. You really didn't expect me to answer that did you? After all I am an enigma.
Nicknames: none ya.
Birthday: 6th of March
Age: Aquarius. Oh wait, did you mean that chronological thing?
Sign (Chinese & Zodiac): the intuitive, secretive, elusive, and sexy Pisces. My Chinese sign: "two nine nine you buy. Good Price." Alright, that was hilarious. Rude as hell (sorry) but funny. Guess you must not live in the right place. Honestly, I don't remember my Chinese zodiac. I think it maybe monkey or horse. Or are those my sisters?
Sex: Female
Location: Philadelphia, PA, USA
Height: 5'9"
Eye Color: Brown. (not light not dark not medium. medium light brown...lol)
Hair Color: dark red & brown
Shoe Size: hee!
Do you have any pets?: noper
Parents: deceased
Siblings (how many/age/name): 5: 3bros/52, 50, 46 and 2 sis/54, 47....I think I got those right. Dang they're old! I'm waaaaaay younger than my siblings. Most people think my sister is my mom. Sometimes, I wonder. lol
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: boyfriend. unfortunately no
Do you have a crush?: on a real person? lol, no
What are your screen names?: Enigma, Kat, Sephora, "yada yada yada and whatever the hell else"
If you have a web page, what is the link?: Well, duh! In case you've opted never to go to my main page here ya go: Enigma's Conundrurm
What font/color/size do you use?: depends on what I'm looking for/ depends on what I'm doing/usually 12
Food: Italian.
Drink: water, -ades......when life hands me a citrus fruit, i'll make a refreshing drink, juice (esp fresh squeezed)
Book: none
Movie: No way for me to answer this.
Candy: Not big on candy but I like smarties a lot
Gum: none really.
TV Show: John Doe, Buffy
Actor: I don't have one.
Actress: Bette Davis
Web Site: I'm gonna plead the 5th on that one. Ain't gon get me to hurting feelings. *wink wink*
Disney Movie: The Littel Mermaid
Video Game: I don't play video games. Use to love me some ......uhhhhhh.....tempest. I think that was the name.
Soundtrack: West Side Story
Cartoon: Inu Yasha or Yuyu Hakusho or Reign: Legend of the Conqueror
Color: most shades of blue, black, and most shades of purple (esp lavendar)
Computer Font: I don't have one. I think there should be an Enigma's hand though. Should be completely illegible or atleast tough to decipher.
Ice Cream Flavor: How many times I gotta say I don't eat ice cream?!
Pizza Topping: none. i like tomato pies if its seasoned well. if not just gimme plain.
Guy's Name: David, Noah, Justin, Bo (yes Bo....shut up! not Boregard. just Bo), Xavier (never would do it), Vincent
Gal's Name: mine, Naomi, and a few others lol
Holiday: none
Magazine: none. not even TVGuide
Day: today? Thursday. in general? today
Music Group: not really into groups. there are maybe 2..dang I can only think of 1....I tolerate.
Place to eat: Chellie's (my sister)
Quotes: I don't really go around quoting people. but.....
"A man is only good in two positions: on his back or on his knees. Only then can he keep you truly satisfied."-- Zsa Zsa
"I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair. Bye" -- Bette Davis
"Bitch...Can I call you 'b' for short?" -- Justin Timberlake
"You must be out your rabid ass mind." -- Mi mama
"Yada Yada Yada and whatever the hell else" -- Martin Short
"You dun lost your nut." or some version there of -- Me
that's enough I think.
Song: whoooooa.......um.....first song to pop in my head "Worthy Of" by Justin Timberlake
Season: Spring
Shampoo: Pantene
CD/Album: Of all time? I havent one. At the moment? same answer.
Sport: To watch? Football and almost all Olympic events. To play? hee..u funny.
Who are your friends?: those with whom I am friends. duh!
What are your hobbies?: truly I don't have anything I consider a hobby, because I don't stick to anything for long periods.
What attracts you to the opposite sex?: intelligence, sense of humor, kindness/great heart, wit, charm/charisma, great personality, physical (height, nice guns (arms) and thighs, beautiful smile, nice lips), ability to listen and share
What do you want to be when you grow up?: when I grow up, maybe 2 or 3 or 4, I'll come knocking on your door.....wooo Shirley Temple mode. I'm back now. Happy and healthy
Stupidest thing you have done?: I've not listed them in order of stupidity so, I wouldn't know. Perhaps thinking filling this out was a good idea.
What one wish would you want to come true?: Being happy with my life, my surroundings, and having the love of my life to share it with
Whats your worst habit?: procrastination
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change?: procrastination/lack of motivation.
How many buddies are on your buddy list?: which one? doesnt matter too damn many. Gotta be like Tia and get to cutting
Do you hope to be married one day?: I hope to be mated. marriage brings the government into a union that is none of their damn business
What's your biggest fear?: dying unloved and alone
What really annoys you?: ahhhh pet peeve time....wooo ummm just one thing? liars. I HATE A LIAR!
What makes you happy?: I'm not quite sure because sometimes I don't know when I'm happy until its over. Good times/convo with good people. the perfect song to fit my mood right then or that moves me in some way. a movie that pulls me into it. a great joke. thinking. a walk. babies and children laughing and playing. seeing men with children.
What makes you sad?: child abuse. death & destruction. my family at times
Have you ever been in love?: No.
How many times have you said "I Love You" and meant it?: I don't know how to say I love you. (I didn't just write it. I meant it) It's very difficult thing for me to say, I'm getting better I think. So everytime I've said it, I've meant it.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: Not really.
Do you believe in fate?: yes
Is it possible for a long distance realtionship to work?: Depends on the people.
Has anyone ever broken your heart?: yes
Have you ever broken someone else's heart?: I don't believe so.
Have you ever cheated in a relationship?: no
Has anyone ever cheated on you in a relationship?: well define relationship. do backstabbing skank ass friends count? No? oh well then...nah.
Do you want to fall in love?: most definitely
If you could be in a relationship with anyone, who would it be?: oh c'mon! You mean like a real person walking down the street or a celebrity? You gotsta be off your nut if you think I'm gonna answer this one. No, I really have no bloody idea. Now, making some guy my babies' daddy is a dif subject all together. lmao
PhillyKat at 11:58:00 PM |
PhillyKat at 12:01:00 AM | I just realized I never blogged about Fame. It was fantastic. I love Debbie Allen. I have been a fan of hers since I was a little girl. I'm not sure exactly when I saw her first, but I know she was dancing. One of my earliest Debbie memories was when she played Michael Evans' prom date on Good Times.
Debbie will be Debbie and she will break yo face. Just ask Carnie Wilson as she lifted new face up off the desk. Carnie attempted, and I do say a-temp-ted to correct Ms. Debbie. You do not try to step on, over, or around Debbie Allen. I wish I remembered everything she said because Carnie tried 2x to speak over her and got shut up both times. "Oh no Ms Thing this is my time. You had your time. You didn't say anthing about potential." Debbie continued while Carnie sat there looking stupid. To quote Joey Fatone from *Nsync, "She told you." Everyone in the finals are Debbie's kids. She is the lioness and you will not speak ill about one of her cubs.
The group performances are 1000x better than American Idol (I only saw the first season but I feel safe in saying it was better than them too). Why? Cuz Debbie worked the hell out them kids. They came out like it was opening night on Broadway. Yeah, some of them aren't as adept at dancing at others, but they were adequate. They danced and sang live. I have yet to see Janet, Madonna, or Britney do that. So thumbs up!!!!
PhillyKat at 8:24:00 PM |
DEATH TO TICKETMASTER and all their brethren!
Check this:
I purchased online tickets on the 1st of April. On the 6th I received an email stating that they had been printed and mailed. On the 13th of May I emailed customer service inquiring about the ticket status and stated "I want the tickets or my money back. Waiting until 48hrs before the concert is unacceptable." Ticketmaster policy is we take your money immediately; you wait for what could amount to months for your ticket. On the 14th I recieved a reply from George that didn't address my email. It was just more tixmasta gobbleygok. I emailed them back on the 14th and have yet to receive a response.
Today, I called. Let me first say that customer service is obviously not a priority. Long story short, I didn't loose my cool...I was stern but cool..they did. Hee! Tomorrow, I will wait for the supervisor's supervisor to call me back. She actually offered me a solution I could deal with, but I really feel like fucking with them now! In case you don't know someone in customer service can be either your best or your worst customer. I bucking for infamy. Wish me luck!
PhillyKat at 7:37:00 PM |
I am so ready to change my file. I've fallen in love with I Don't Wanna Be by Gavin DeGraw. (I will be editing music section soon to include him.) Problem is: I don't have any room to upload it so I'd hafta delete something. Gah!! I just listened to it a few times to get the lyrics down.
I Don’t Wanna Be
by Gavin DeGraw
I don’t need to be anything other
Than a prison guard’s son
I don’t need to be anything other
Than a specialist’s son
I don’t have to be anyone other
Than the birth of 2 souls in one
Part of where I’m going
Is knowing where I’m coming from
Chorus:
I don’t wanna be anything other
Than what I been trying be lately
All I hafta do is think of me
And my peace of mind
I’m tired of looking round rooms
Wondering what I gotta do
Or who I’m supposed to be
I don’t wanna be anything other than me
I’m surrounded by liars
Everywhere I turn
I’m surrounded by imposters
Everywhere I turn
I’m surrounded by identity crisis
Everywhere I turn
All I only wanna know is
If I can be the only who’s learned
PhillyKat at 12:43:00 AM | I need to make some serious changes. *Heah* (sarcastic smirky sound) When, I started that sentence I was referring to my site, I'm iso a new layout, but as I finished typing 'serious,' I realized it should be overall change. I need a metamorphosis. My chrysalis no longer fits me. I'm tired of being held down by an invisible ceiling, gonna break that bitch. I'm tired of being forced back by that velvet rope. I'm a burn that muthafucka the next time it crosses my path. Then I'm going to rise up from it's ashes like a Phoenix. (Alright, did anyone just flash to Harry Potter & the Chamber of Secrets or is just me? Just me? Ah, alright, I'm used to that.)
I hold my self back. Man, I'm gonna kick my own ass. When the hell did I put on a straight jacket? Though, I'm sure a few people think I belong in one, I assure you I do not. I'm crazy, not insane! :D Hey, that sounds like a good title for something or other. I need to get off my ass and just do it. Well, I want to move west (NV OR AZ), so I need to get motivated. I want to learn script writing, so I need to get motivated. Hell, judging by the lack of good movies coming out of Hollyweird, they need new ideas. (Problem: I hate Hollyweird. And y'all wonder what kind of conundrums I have. Sheesh!) To quote Gavin DeGraw "I don't wanna be anything other than me." I'm wasting away. I refuse to be refuse. (I'll wait while you get your dictionary. Can't find it? Go to Merriam Webster. You with me? Good. Let's dance.)
It's time to rock people. It's time to get things moving. No one is getting younger and no one should waste away. So, let's make a pack, you and me, let's pledge to go for it. You see a guy or girl you like, step up and be heard. Find your voice. TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU: If you don't tell a person you like them, chances are they don't know. If it's one thing I hate, it's a guy I've known forever coming up to me with a wedding band on telling me how they use to like me. Nigga please. WTF am I supposed to do about that now? You wanna write, then fucking write. How you gonna be a writer if your ass never writes anything gatdamnit!? You wanna sing, then fucking sing. Move it out the shower baby. Move it out the shower. You wanna dance, then put yo gatdamn dancing shoes on and make like Fred Astaire, Nuryev, Fosse with a hint of Missy thrown in! Getch you some blisters! You wanna go to school or back to school, fucking go! Let the kids help you with your homework. Just make like a Nike campaign and just do it. Deal?
God, it's fucking fantastic to have Debbie Allen back on television. That woman motivates me like no other!
PhillyKat at 11:57:00 PM |
Question(s) to all you AI2 viewers who said this season's talent paled to last years: Huh? I've heard a bit of Reuben's voice but it didn't repell. I just finished listening to a song by Clay called This Is the Night and dude's voice is fantastic. Since the Sumo of Soul (hee Jay Leno called him that) beat Clay, I can only draw the conclusion that Sumo's voice is comparable. Sammy, you preferred some chick name Kimberly over the both of them, right? Anyway, my point is none of the guys last year (including Justin, sorry J) had a voice with this much depth and strength, only the women. I never heard Kimberly sing, but if she's better than these 2, her voice should be as strong as Kelly's. Is it? And if it is, dayum! Basically, what I'm trying to figure out is why you guys hated on them so much.
PhillyKat at 12:58:00 AM | I am broken. I don't know if I can be fixed. There's no wire disconnected, no blown circuit or fuse, no broken switch. I'm just broken. There's something missing. I think something that went undeveloped during my gestation. Or possibly it was supposed to be nurtured and grow as I did in my childhood through smiles, hugs & kisses, parental support, the sound of mom & dad saying "I love you." Or maybe, just maybe, it was supposed to grow through the self reliance and assurance taught during childhood. Here's the thing, I didn't grow up with Mike and Carol Brady as my parents. There weren't conversations in my house. There was yelling. There was fussing. There was abuse. There was fear and intimidation. There was complaining and the ever-so-popular "I'll give you something to cry for," or "Dummy," or "Ugly," but no "I love you."
I wrote something not to long ago called I Don't Know How to Say I Love You. In it I say because I never learned. I was serious. Everything I know about healthy relationships, love, et al I learned from spying on other people, living vicariously, reading, and daydreaming. In other words, I don't know jack. Wish that I did. I would love to, but I don't. And the older I become, the less likely I will ever learn. I will stay broken. Chances are a single man in my age a) is damaged, b) thinks all single women play games, c) is gay, d) is broken in his own unique way, e) is a combo, or f) has some kind of damage that surpasses even my imagination. At any rate, he probably will not have the patience needed to understand me.
Whatever the issue with him might be, it doesn't matter. It doesn't negate the fact that I'm broken and without extra pieces or instruction. I've come along way in repairing myself, but there's only so far I can go without a 3rd or 4th shoulder to lean on, 2 arms to fall into, and a chest to lay my head on. So, there ya go. No love life. No child. No instructions. No pieces. Nothing. I'm just broken.
PhillyKat at 11:17:00 PM |
I am freezing. It appeared as if the daily drenchings were over, but it got dark around 4 and the temp dropped. The weather is ridiculous. It truly truly is.
PhillyKat at 6:12:00 PM | My blogger template is back but some of my code was changed. *rolleyes* I am perturbed. My template code is as it was back in March but my site is not showing it. This is ridiculous.
PhillyKat at 5:04:00 PM | I am such a spud russet. Amazing Race 3 starts this Thursday and I can not wait. I'm almost giddy with anticipation. *sigh* I need something more.
PhillyKat at 11:58:00 PM |
Sorry about any pop up error that might greet you as you come on. Blogger is having issues yet again and I am unable to update my template. As a matter of fact my template is gone is which is kind of scarey. I'm not 100% sure that I'm not typing this in vain.
I'm not feeling well today. It has been cold and rainy. Everyone laughs at me, but as far as I am concerned summer came in February and ended in April in Philadelphia (with intermittent cold days). The weather now is, man I dunno, fall like. I wouldn't be phased one bit if it snows in July. Truly, I wouldn't.
PhillyKat at 8:38:00 PM | I've finished reading the last 5 entries of SourBob and I think I see what has prompted his self revelation and subsequent retirement. I think perhaps he realized something he didn't want to know about women. A woman can be nastier, sneakier and more vicious than any man she's pitted against. And that's without effort. A woman on a mission is unstoppable.
If you clicked the link and read the entry, here's something you should know about women, a woman will attack a man. I mean beat on him, kick him, declare all out physical war all the while daring him to hit her back so she can call the police or destroy his character. Two of my 3 ex (thank god) sister-in-laws attacked and almost killed 2 of my brothers. One tried to stab my brother and when she couldn't she sliced up his arm. She was a nurse, so she knew exactly where to strike. He has like 80-85% mobility in the arm. The other hid behind a door and when my brother came in she attacked him with a frying pan. The first one is actually certifiably insane (no really I'm serious). The other is just an evil little imp that I could do without.
PhillyKat at 9:31:00 PM |
A sad day for blog readers everywhere: Sour Bob has retired. You guys know creativity and honesty are turn-ons for me right? SB is both. His forthrightness and honesty is what inspired me to actually make entries that are "real" instead of bullshit filler because I just wanted to post something. Now, he has left me.
I do understand why. And, if truth be told, am a tad bit jealous. You see, SB has come to a realization, an understanding within himself at the ripe old age of 27 that I am not only envious of but desire. Not only does he know that "All I have to do is quit bitching and do the work" he's doing it.
So, my hat's off to you SB, happy travels. Cheers!
PhillyKat at 8:28:00 PM |
1. What brand of toothpaste do you use? Crest
2. What brand of toilet paper do you prefer? Um, a soft one but not too thick. i like kleenex but they don't make it anymore. charmin bought them...not as good, but sitll better than Scotts. Hate Scotts.
3. What brand(s) of shoes do you wear? i wear fit'ems and like'ems. don't care who they're by if i like 'em and they fit, i'll wear 'em. i have no brand affiliation for shoes.
4. What brand of soda do you drink? none really. mostly Goya or 305 seltzer/spritzers from whole foods
5. What brand of gum do you chew? again i really don't chew gum. maybe doublemint
PhillyKat at 1:15:00 AM | Yeah I know the bg is busy. Deal with it. I'm so ticked. Netfirms refuses to play well with almost every layout I like. It's ridiculous. But, I'll deal. Why? Cuz it's free and I have hella space. That's why. Blame me? I think not
I've been awakening with movies in my head again. They're so clear. It's like I'm there. I just never know what is being said when I awake. I still see the ending scene of this last one. I think it was called The Letter. John Tuturro or someone like him was on a roof top to a 2 or 3 story house. He was in a lawn chair and I think there was an empty one. There was some sort of small table or large cooler. It was set up like a beach scene almost. I think the first floor was a store front. He was reading a letter printed on what looked like rice paper stationary..very thin. It was from a woman. I remember it was beautiful. A kiss off or explaination or something, but beautiful. He put his arm up, letter in hand, and let the wind take it. *pull back que end theme fade to black run credits* I woke up. Apparently, this woman he loved was not what she appeared to be. She had a double or perhaps triple life. One of these lives had something to do with Gene Hackman or Anthony Hopkins. I'm not sure which was in my head. I tend to switch back and forth between the 2 when I'm in need of an actor of their caliber. I certainly wish I remembered more of that dream.
I laid in bed wallowing in self pity again this morning. Started thinking about my childhood and things that have happened. I must learn to see/think about things from the past without re-experiencing it. I have trouble with that. That hurt little girl rules me. Little bitch! Fear and a hurt little girl. Yep, I'm a catch. Who wants somma me? *roll eyes at my damn self* What I need to do is write it down, but I don't know if I'm strong enough for that. I don't have that many decades under my belt. Maybe when I'm 50.
I've got nothing else to say, so I'm out. No, I do wanna make one observation. What kind of ego do we online journal keepers have to think people wanna read the craziness that goes through our minds? I have done far better at keeping this journal than any other I have ever started that no one has read. I feel guilty if I don't post something daily like I'm letting you down. Most you people don't even leave comments......you could sign the guestbook though. I know you're out there. I have site meter. I see you. One day you need to say hi, bonjour, g'day, or w/e you say.
Oh and to all you people who are iso Marsupalami lyrics....I posted them back in March sometime. I'm sorry that I keep coming up under cartoon lyric searches. *sigh* If Marsupalami was so dang popular, I wonder why it didn't even last a full season? Oh, well. Here are all the lyrics I remember: Hoo Marsupalami got me running through the jungle/Got a tale to tell you/ Have a swinging time/Say Hooba Hoooo Marsupalami
Peace Out!
PhillyKat at 11:56:00 PM | I'm going to post some goals I want accomplished by this time next year. I'm going to post them as they come to me so order be damned
Goal: Loose weight. Fuck society! I don't like it. There, how's that Mo'Nique? Girlfriend must be hella short cuz she claims she's only 220lbs. Jigga wha?
Goal: Meet a guy that I actually like and vice versa. That translates into reel in the trust issues in case you're wondering.
Goal: Write a story from begining to end. Not a treatment. Not an idea. Not a line or 3. But a complete full story. Even if it's utter and complete garbage.
Goal: Be happy!
Decided to edit and post what I'm looking for in a man just in case you guys know anyone. So, in no particular order, here goes:
Loving - i think that self explanatory. oh, he's gotta be able to show it, but not be all touchy feely all the time.
Kind - a good guy. doesn't mean wimpy or boring. just caring
Intelligent - i'm no stephen hawking, but i'm no slouch either. if he can't hold a convo or form/voice his own opinions, he can step.
Great Sense of Humor - can not be with someone who can not see the humor in things. so, he's gotta have a s.o.h., he'll be pummeled.
Witty - if he's intelligent w/a soh, he's probably witty. it doesn't hurt to make sure.
Honest - i really mean honest! i hate a liar. also, can accept the truth. most men say they want a truthful woman, but when they meet one they rather have a game player. i don't have time for games if they're not by milton bradley, parker brothers, etc.
Temperment - even. i'm moody with a hot temper (though it dies down quickly). shouldn't be 2 of us.
Straight - not in the closet. not bi. not bi-curious. but a heterosexual! i catch u bending over, your ass is dead, esp if i wind up with a disease.
Faithful - yeah, read that dead part above. i think i probably would have some leadway for someone in a career where groupies gather, as long as he knows a) the only thighs worn as earmuffs are mine, b) let her get on her knees and stay there, c) need to get laid? call me!
Personality - a good one..obviously. not someone who's always hype or nervous, but not always laid back like he's on a permanent canubis high. just a nice mix between the 2. protective but not overly...knows people need their space. someone who doesn't feel the need to fill up all the quiet w/conversation. understands the need for contemplation, meditation, relaxation, and the all important 'me' time. likes a good hug. able to stop and see the beauty around him. not jealous of male friends.
The Physical:
Looks: Attractive. what? i'm not gonna lie. i've told u guys before, my family will break the will of an ugly man. slice and dice
Height: taller than me and i'm 5'9". prefereably 6' to 6'3"
Build: i dun really care. shit, look at the celebs i'm attracted to. george clooney, ice cube (mah baybay), timberlake! i'm all over.
Hair: no type of processing. if its naturally curly, it had better still be. brunette preferably.
Makeup: none! i've never been attracted to prince, michael jackson, marilyn manson, or eddie izzard.
Piercings: 2 earrings alright but not a body full of piercings
Tattoos: let's just say i'm not interested in the incredible tattooed man.
Kissable: self explanatory. me likey the suckable lips.
Jeez, I am picky. Oh well!
I'm sure you've noticed that I did not mention money or job. That's because I really don't care. I want someone who has time for me so if his career is all encompassing, he probably doesn't want me. If he can manage his life and his career, then yea me! Y'all know travel is fine, as long as he doesn't mind if I pop-up from time to time cuz I'm a travel ho as you know.
PhillyKat at 7:57:00 PM |
I'm on the verge of beating the shit out of mouf. I'll keep you posted.
edit: 6 hrs and 10 mins later.....
Well, I'm not in jail, but don't hold out hope. Suffice it to say, something incredibly stupid and illegal happened, and I've been just waiting for her to say something so I can cut her. Unfortunately, she's not that stupid. Plus, Tia said I couldn't kill her 'til she had some money for bail.
PhillyKat at 1:33:00 PM | Alright let me explain yesterday. I said yes to working the polls today. TODAY! Today, the last first run episode of Buffy: the Vampire Slayer. Me! The person with the broken vcrs! How bloody stupid can I get. I swear. I'm praying for a tape to come my way.
I had something else I wanted to say, damned if I know what the hell it was. Oh well.
*** 2 Minutes later ***
Nice dip in the pool
Put your paws up! Put 'em up!
PhillyKat at 9:43:00 PM | My dear friends,
I am an idiot.
Love,
Enigma
PhillyKat at 10:54:00 PM |
Arnold Schwartzenigger is 55! Damn! It's time to stop jumping from fake explosions don't you think? He's had some serious plastic surgery! Oh, c'mon grow up! You know he has.
PhillyKat at 7:35:00 PM | YOU GOTTA SEE THIS NEW VIDEO. Check it out.
PhillyKat at 10:31:00 PM |
Alright, we went to the cemetary yesterday. First, we all had breakfast. That was fun. Then, we went to Michelle's to consolidate cars I guess you would say. We were there for about an hour because we all arrived different times. One of my brothers, Kenny, ran a light and got pulled over so we had to wait for him. That was about a half hour wait (he has out of state plates and you know cops can be assholes).
We got to the cemetary and it was hideous. The owners have obviously changed. It has not been kept up the way it should have been at all. My father and mother aren't together. (Don't ask) My mom is in the supposed new section. There were wild geese all over that section. Wild geese and wild goose shit on peoples graves and grave markers. It was appalling. Funny thing, it was all around my mom's but not on my mom's plot. Like they knew better or had been shoed away. Or, like someone had cleaned it off maybe. I dunno.
Hope this doesn't sound morbid, but I had fun. lol
*********
This is a cp of a convo between shelby and myself about a picture she linked to me. The picture was just too sad.
shelby: oh this is the gayest gay that ever gayed: SEE THE PIX
kat: oh god. my hand flew to my mouth. i look like i smelled something that stinks
shelby: lmao
kat: k i was wondering y jc arm is so flickded (lol) and its justin's. chris looks like he groping a breast
kat: lance's breast
shelby: lmfao
kat: and he look like he should have a pai. good god he gay!
shelby: bwahehehehehehehe is what i juss did
kat: they all look like young kids having a good time xcpt for chris who looks like he's up to something and lance who looks like its a sexual fantasy come true. "noooooo pull the ropes tighter! jc get cloooossssssser"
kat: lmao @ u
shelby: oh god u killin me
kat: i mean j look at him! he's ready to drop trow and bend over
shelbys: lmfao
kat: now that i look more at it, po po look like he trynta push lance off w/o actually touching him. like he using the bottom of his hand...must keep fingers away lest he show up in my room again
shelby:lmao
kat: and look at his face. he aint happy. he knew that shit was gay
kat: i wonda who roomed w/whom.
shelby: no one wanted to room w/ lance after that shoot
kat: if lance and jc roomed together........right! .......u know they are CLOSE
kat: ooooooouuuuuuuuu j..........lance look like timmy from passions. tell me i'm lying.
shelby: lmao. omg he dooooes
kat: k i just cracked my shit up
shelbys: ok i gotta close that pic out
kat: k and jc look like a girl with that fake head tilt saying "no stop. we can't" "tee hee no lance"
shelby: (emoticon)
kat: pathetic. thats fucking kiddie porn. where's justin shirt? somebody shoulda taken custody! lol
shelby: (emoticon)
kat: sike i c it. but its hard to see. joey & chris got vests. how f'n gay porn is that (neva seen one but i'm sure they wear vests. just look at lance....and his is open and inviting). ohhhh the photographer should be shot!
shelby: STOOOOOOOOOP
kat: i can hear him now w/a lisp.....*suck teef* ok boysth. here'sth the sitch. *suck teef* we gon wraps ewwwwe in wope *suck teef* and *suck teef* yall gon hafta struggles to get out. mmmmm kay *suck teef* nah, lets getchu and ewwwe in da front *suck teef* o i know.....*suck teef* letsth getchu in da middle mmmmmmm hmmmmmm and open up da vest. mmmm dis will be fierce *snap*
shelby: "yall gon hafta struggles to get out. mmmmm kay " roflmfao
shelby: lmao..our theme song! http://incredible.nu/dorks/stuff/bored.shtml
AND THAT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN IS WHAT HAPPENS TO 2 INTELLIGENT WOMEN WHEN THEY ARE BORED SHITLESS ON THE NET!!!!!!! k, mostly me, since j was laughing too much type but trust me.....it's indicative.
PhillyKat at 6:24:00 PM | Feeling a little pissed off. Not entirely sure why. I know what I think, but I hate to admit thats it. Anyway, everything I feel like typing comes out snarky or downright bitchy. You know I think it's a culmination of things..emotions.
Tomorrow my siblings (all but 1) and I are suppose to go to the cemetary where my parents and my Nana (paternal grandmom) are buried. I am no fan of cemetaries. I do not like to walk amongst grave markers. (I was about to say the dead, but I do that daily.) I honestly feel that visiting graves is a little simpleminded if you're going to go there to be close to your love one. What makes people think that the spirit of the dead hang around in a park for the dead instead of places where their family/friends gather or places they once loved? I dunno. I don't get it. I wasn't going, but I've changed my mind for 2 reasons: a) I wanna make sure the perpetual upkeep for the graves is being done since I paid alot for it, and b) I don't wanna hear any bullshit about my not going. (Wow! After I finished re-reading this the Daytime Emmys did their memoriam section. Talk about timing!)
I am freezing. I don't know if I'm in need of some serious iron or if it's the weather. Lemme ck. You wait here. (less than a minute later) Daaaang! Isn't it May? It's 50F, but it feels like 44. And it's raining. Tha hell? May showers bring June flowers? I may put my timbs on tomorrow. Shiiiiit, not gonna wear any shoes or my sneaks up in a cemetary if it's raining. As it stands I'm wearing jeans and I don't care what anyone thinks.
PhillyKat at 10:11:00 PM |
1. What drinking water do you prefer -- tap, bottle, purifier, etc.? distilled
2. What are your favourite flavor of chips? plain (ruffle cut), low or no salt,
3. Of all the things you can cook, what dish do you like the most? hmmmm.....does hot cereal count? me likey cereal. i8! i8! eggplant parm
4. How do you have your eggs? under my chicken. i very rarely eat them and when i do they hafta be full of stuff so i forget that its chicken ovum. basically an omelette (garbage can omelette...everything in it..almost). I like cheese (not spose to eat it); sauteed onions (lots), sweet peppers, spinach, and maybe some sprouts; plus extras if i feel like crumbled up bacon (soy)
5. Who was the last person who cooked you a meal? How did it turn out? cooked me a meal...full meal? oh well mouf made me an omelette last week i think. it was good.
PhillyKat at 1:10:00 AM | I've been remiss in the sharing of the fun. So, please accept this as a token of my apologies. It's a snarky article regarding the baldness of hip hop. Enjoy!
PhillyKat at 11:06:00 PM |
Well, I did it. I did the accelerated body sculpting pilates exercises today. Nothing for the most part. My hips and that's all. I think that's because I pushed myself. Even if I were doing them wrong I should feel something, shouldn't I? Now, of course, I skipped some exercises. Some of them aren't meant for a those of us who are -licious (tatalicious, bootylicious, leglicious). If you're liciousness is double, you can basically forget it. Girlie, had them list their legs up and over their heads until their feet are touching the floor past their heads. Gatdamn dancers. Look like they were trying to perform on themselves, if you feel me. I am NOT Annie Sprinkle!
The so-called modified exercises for anyone with a bad back or neck are bullshit! There are exercises that NEEEEED modification that don't have any. Oh and the gatdamn director sucks. The instructor is telling you to watch girlie for modification but the damn director rarely ever cuts to her. I've got my own modifications ...somewhere between their mods and the normal.
I really don't see how this is working my abs. I keep them tight (for the most part), but it still all seems like leg work, which I don't mind. Legs are the largest muscles in the body and by working them you will loose, but I want too FEEL it. Now, what will be funny is if I can't even roll over on my side tomorrow morning. Alright, maybe not as funny as painful, but that'll learn me.
PhillyKat at 10:15:00 PM | Changed the music files on here (natch) and on the main page
PhillyKat at 10:40:00 PM |
I did my pilates already today. Plus, I did some calf exercises cuz I don't really feel anything in my calves (or thighs) when I finish pilates. I meant to do some squats today, but I forgot. Apparently, I did a little better with the hips and booty cuz I feel it there. This is only my 2nd week, so I shouldn't complain. I'm just use to feeling 'it,' yah know? My guess is 2 months of target training without cardio built muscle but it's surrounded by fat because I wasn't doing cardio. Right now I'm watching the intermediate pilates workout. I don't know if I can do it cuz the legs are up in the air alot....these bias ain't got the thighs of a sista if you feel me. (Woooo she has them doing some crazy shit, yo. I ain't neva been that flexible. I'd be in fucking Cirque du Soleil if I were. Hmm beginners is looking betta. lmao)
I was yelling at the instructor today (mind you she's on tape), too. She's all hold on to your ankles and I'll be like 'bitch, I can't reach my ankles do u see these damn breasts' (not to mention the belly)! She keeps saying get tight into a ball. I ain't been able to get like that since I left b cups.
I'm tired of exercise tapes showing Mr & Ms. "Perfect" Body. These muthafukas don't sweat and it is annoying as hell, especially when you all drippy wishing you had got worked out rolling around with somebody (or under somebody) if you feel me. You know what I want to see? Fat people! Fat people working out! Seriously. I don't want to see them jumping up and down or sweatin' to the oldies, but doing things like pilates. Honestly, what I prefer is the instructor alone doing the workout with you like Tony Little or Billy Blank. If they must have demonstrators, I'd like to see people at different levels: beginning (fat person....not some bia that is whining over 5-20 pounds, but a heavster! or atleast make it someone struggling.), intermediate (the whiney), and expert (bring on the models & dancers). The chick in the front is so obvious a dancer. She's a dancer or a circus freak. She has a dancer's feet...ugly. I look at her and think "You can kick that leg but you have horse hooves for feet!"
Holy shit! This ain't intermediate. It's accelerated. No wonda. I'm going to try it anyway. I just won't do what I can't do and I won't care. I'll hold off on adding in the target training. If tomorrow you get an entry that reads, "waaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh," accelerated
dun kicked my ever loving ass and I've dragged myself to the tub of warm water and epsom salt.
PhillyKat at 4:56:00 PM |
I am pissed. I would like to go to bed, but I am too angry. I emailed ticketmaster yesterday because I haven't received tix that I purchased online on 1st of April. They emailed me on the 6th saying they were mailed. I emailed them saying send my tickets or my money because waiting until 48hrs before the concert is unacceptable.
Some jerk answers saying your tickets were mailed on the 3rd. If I don't have them, let them know 48hrs from the date and I can pick them up at the box office. Tha hell? How do they know if that is going to be convenient for me? I told them it was not. Did that fool even read my damn email. First of all, finding out that they were mailed on the 3rd makes me even angrier. Secondly, he didn't address what I said. Plus, what makes them think I am attending the event? Just because you buy something does not mean, you're going to be the one using it. So, I've emailed them again saying 'I want my tickets now or my money.' Let's see what they say to that.
PhillyKat at 12:47:00 AM | Wow! No, posts from me in a few days. I certainly haven't been busy I don't think. I've been in the dumps. I need to find a job. I'm afraid I will have to go to retail.....GOD I HATE RETAIL......even if only p/t. The bills won't wait. I've been very very weepy and scared.
Tonight, I answered my first online ad. I was scared, lol. I don't know why but I was. The ad was a telecommuting ad (work from home). I was going to post my resume on monster.com again, but it went wacko on me. I held off on that for a bit. I'll just keep (ok is anyone else tired of the Matrix infused commercials or is it just me?) searching.
I'm seriously thinking about setting up a site and begging people for money. I probably have missed the end of the fiscal year for most
people and orgs, but I still might try it. My student loan is a compounding exponentially. I have past due balances and I'm not use to it. You guys thought I was joking about starting a porn site for big breast lovers but it's starting to sound alright. I can set up a corner of my house and just have some big tittied mamas come in for pix. Maybe I can set up a live webcam. I'd sit here typing topless. lol
Alright, you know the lol was bullshit cuz that's sounding like a good idea at about right now.
As you can tell, I AM NOT HAPPY NOR USE TO BEING BROKE.
edit: Alright this weekend certainly was a blur, not only didn't I realize that I had blogged this weekend, I dunno wth I was on about. Sweet Mary! Next time I'm just gonna nap.
PhillyKat at 12:02:00 AM | I just got finished listening to Amerie's version of "I'm Coming Out" originally done by Diana Ross. It sent me running for Diana. Trust me that is not something I do lightly. Cain't stand me some Diana. But her version is infinitely better than Ameries.
Shrink had somebody's version of "Good Love" on his blog. *smacking lips* Meh. It left a bad taste in my mouth. That's my favorite Anita Baker song. Blasphemy!
And who was it a few years ago thought it was a good idea to remake an Angela Bofill song? Who authorizes these things? Certainly not me. And why I'm asking about authorization, I've always wondered what posesses Prince to let 2nd rate (if that good) singers remake his songs. I think that man be high sometimes, yo. I really do.
*sigh* Why won't people leave good songs alone? If they wanna remake a song, why don't they try something that they can easily make theirs like a track off a LaToya Jackson lp?
edit: i8 I just gave (attempted anyway) Amerie's version another listen because I realize since she showed up at the Soul Train Awards in her lingerie my opinion of her has soured. Shit, let's be real, it molded! Anyway, my conclusion is, this bia can not sing. Woooo lawd!
PhillyKat at 2:05:00 AM | WARNING: Rambling Bitchfest Below
When famous multi-millionaires go too far, is anyone there to say "Enough is enough?"
This is my opinion mind you, but famous people go a little nuts, especially when they try to spread their wings. Granted some do turn into good actors llike David Bowie, but some just fizzle like Shaq. I guess I'm wondering why do models, athletes, actors and singers all want to do each others jobs?
What kind of ego must you have to think just because your at the top of your game singing (or god forbid modeling), you can put your ass in front of a camera and act? Unless you've had training (lots and lots of training) and acted before becoming a famous singer or model, stop taking jobs away from real actors. How thick do you think Madonna's head really is? When is she going to realize what the rest of the world knows. Ma, sweetie, love ya, but YOU CAN NOT ACT. If you must persist in your folly, think ensemble sweetie. Think supporting cast/bit player. You are sooooo not a leading lady.
And actors........STOP SINGING!!!! Keanu, gah! Russell Crow, double gah! And now Collin Farrell!! Sweet Mary! Alright alright if the role calls for singing and if they can carry a tune (or should I say toon), let them go ahead. But I'm sorry, no one should have to sit through Vin Diesel trying to sing. He admitted he can't. Guys & Dolls deserves better than that. Yes, Brando was in the original, but fuckin' hell he's fuckin' BRANDO man! You, Vin Diesel, are no Marlon Brando. (I just saw a commercial for The Guardian season finale. Who the hell is watching that show? I wanna know. Who? Agh!) I hope if Hollywood should decided to make another musical, they find actors that can really sing and dance (a la Catherine Zeta-J) or singers/dancers that can act (ummm......thinking....alright all I can think is Joe Fatone). And Hollywood, if you do cast Vin Diesel and Nicole Kidman, go to broadway for your supporting cast. Or maybe Joe and ummmmm Mandy Moore. Agh! For god's sake, the entertainment industry is in trouble.
The age of the all around entertainer is gone I fear. I sat here trying to think up some all around entertainers (that are good not just passable). Dude, they were all 50+. I think the youngest was Gregory Hines. I know someone is reading this thinking Janet is good. No, she isn't. Her acting is passable bordering on alright (no pun intended), but I still maintain, and will stick to it 'til my dying day, Janet can't dance. If you can't freestyle, if you can't just groove to the music without choreography, your ass can't dance. That's just the bottom line. Some of y'all may think Jenny Lo. To you I say, Ha! That bia can't sing and you know it. Monetary success doesn't equal talent. All you "oh if Aaliyah was still alivers" take advice from Justin Timberlake and cry me a river why don't 'cha!
Since I mentioned Justin and Joey, let's talk *Nsync, shall we. Joey was on the stage prior to *Nsync and from what a friend told me, he was great in Rent, so keep up the good work Joe! While you're at it, try out for the Nathan Detroit (played by Frank Sinatra in the 1955 movie) role in G&D. People, they really do need to start putting people who can sing in these movies! Justin, boo, if you're going to start acting (which I'm doubting since you seem to be really into the whole host/interviewer thing. next time Letterman is out, you're in buddy, but I digress), I hope you are taking lessons. Disney kids need help too. Didn't Britney's movie teach you anything? Speaking of Disney kids, JC, classes my love, classes. Chris doesn't act. YOU GO BOY! And Lance. Lance, Lance, Lance.......who told you that turning the The Great Gatsby into musical was a good idea? Furthermore, who told you that you should star in it? Four movies your producing? 4! Are you acting in them all? AAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! Boy, your head is truly in the sky isn't it? Well, at least if you fall, you're closer to good old mother Earth than you would be in space. Oh, you'll still die, but at least maybe you're family will have some pieces they can bury or cremate or whatever you're people do. Don't get me wrong, Lance, I wish you success. I just think you need better idea people. Gimme a call boo.
My dear readers, you may be wondering what drove me to this. A number of articles and one death over the last few weeks have just made famous people irk. It began with Mtv's plans of turning Wuthering Heights into a musical starring 2 actors that have never sung out of the shower and/or Kareoke bar. Is nothing sacred! What's next? Gone With the Wind hip hop style starring 50cent, Nelly, and Missy? They can rename it Same Shit Dif Day, or Ret ta Bizounce, or something equally as idiotic. Oh, and the death was that of actress and singer, Lynn Thigpen. Today's episode of The District was a memorial to her. I started thinking about talent and viola! You would probably know Lynn from her role as The Chief from that Carmen Sandiego kids show.
*sigh* I'll quit here. Gonna go back to my book now.
edit: Apparenly JC knows his job. Apparently, before he went into the studio to record the song for Drumline, he was reading scripts. Something Dallas Austin said to him made him think: "And I kind of went home and looked myself in the mirror and was like, 'Dude, you're not an actor. I don't know what you're thinking with that pile of books and stuff like that over there.' I do that stuff to take my mind off of doing music, but at the end of the day I want to be in the studio. I had to look myself in the face and go, 'You can do TV shows, but remember that's not what you do for a living, dude. You do records for a living.' "
PhillyKat at 10:58:00 PM |
What happened to Heavy D? He just stopped rappin'. He was smoooov man. The overweight lova. The death of his friend really took a toll on him. Poor thing.
PhillyKat at 7:50:00 PM | 1. Would you consider yourself an organized person? Why or why not?
no. because i'm not
2. Do you keep some type of planner, organizer, calendar, etc. with you, and do you use it regularly?
no and no. well i do have a palm but i use it as a phone book and memo pad
3. Would you say that your desk is organized right now?
o hell no
4. Do you alphabetize CDs, books, and DVDs, or does it not matter?
yes to cds. no where to store dvds so they're just stacked as are books.
5. What's the hardest thing you've ever had to organize?
my life and i'm not doing it very well
PhillyKat at 12:33:00 AM | Embrace your boredom. I just said that to myself. Why in heaven's name would anyone want to do that? I truly must be slipping off my nut. I need to go back to my job search. It's not like I haven't had a job search engine open for ......oh....3 to 4 hours now. To quote Scarlett O'Hara, "I'll do it tomorrow. Tomorrow is another day." Yes, I know, tomorrow never comes, but isn't it fun to wait for? The idea of a fresh clean palette to start anew is refreshing, isn't it? I think so. No, I have not been sniffing clue. But, oh, the cherry scented marker is divine.
Today, was my 2nd day of pilates. My biceps (or triceps...never could remember which muscle group is which) and my abs hurt. That is so shocking to me. Crunches don't do that. My legs are fine though. (I've always had strong legs.) I'm thinking either I didn't do them correctly or that I need to supplement. I was going to do 2 day pilates and 2 day Tony Little workout(I have his tapes from before he started with the Gazelle). Now, I'm thinking Mari Winsor Pilates supplemented with Target Training for the legs. If I should happen to kill myself, please send all donations and condolences to: OH She was a Dumbass, c/o Kiss My Beige Ass, Philadelphia PA.
PhillyKat at 11:47:00 PM | Well damn, how 'bout all this time, I didn't realize I was taking kiddie quizzes. Oops sorry.....teeny bopper quizzes. lmao. I knew something was a miss, but I guess I just really didn't care. That's part of the boredom thing. I'm going to queendom.com where I belong. Why queendom? Because for the life of me I can not remember the addresses to any of the other quiz sites. Damn, why didn't I go through my favorites and write down the site addresses? Why, Lord why? *rhetorical* [Florida Evans impersonation]Damn. Damn! Damn!!!!![/fei]
Feh, I'm too bored to read. Gonna finish watching Princess Mononoke and maybe watch Clerks. Oh who am I kidding? I'm going to bed. Maybe I'll take Justin with me. It's been awhile since he and I laid together in the quiet. Since he whispered sweet melodies in my ear. Since he stroked my hair and kissed my lips, while parting my........oh I am sooooooo bored.
rofl.....Had y'all going though, didn't I?
PhillyKat at 11:00:00 PM |
Alright, I am bored as hell. When I am bored and am avoiding things in my "real life," I seek things to do online. Usually, I do the same things: surveys, read want ads from the love lorn (and contemplate answering one..hee I never said I wasn't love lorn), go to some of my favorite places to read, and if I become exceptionally bored, go into a chat room to view the happenings.
As you have probably guessed, I'm at the survey stage of my boredom. Well, I better get on with it.
How Daring Are You?
Brave Little Toaster
Props for being brave and pushing the limits! Sure, you might not be the person who raises his or her hand first for skydiving lessons, or tries a different dish on each visit to that Indian restaurant. But you know what it means to be scared of something and do it anyway -- and you know that sometimes that can reward you, and other times kick your butt a little.
39% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.
PhillyKat at 10:29:00 PM |
How's Your Will Power?
Surprise! You're human.
Almost no one's willpower is perfect. Temptation comes in a jillion forms and if you're human, sometimes you give in to it. It's not even like that's an awful thing: sometimes that's what life is about. We forgive you, but now that you know, you could always, you know, try harder. When it really matters.
39% of the people who took this quiz got the same evaluation.
PhillyKat at 10:12:00 PM |
I got this from Justin's blog. Find your Superpower. Below are my results.
Super Mind-Reading Skills
We can't say for sure whether your mind-reading powers would come from some mystical force, or maybe just from sheer intuition, but in the Flipside Super Universe, that's what we think you'd have. And that's nothing to be trifled with. First, you'd be able to predict the next step in some Super Villain's dastardly plan by looking at their face. But even more importantly, you'd be able to figure out whether that Super Cutie is flirting with you, or just being friendly.
only 4% of the people got the same result
PhillyKat at 9:55:00 PM |
Man I am too tired. But my toon is coming on. As I've said my vcrs are acting crazy so I can not tape. I think I really will start begging for dough. I got bills galore!
PhillyKat at 1:28:00 AM | I didn't realiz it was May until today. Really, I did. I knew what month it was, but it wasn't registering. I guess that's because April flew. The reason it hit me because I realized it was the 5th, which means what would have been my dad's 80th birthday (yep, my parents had me LATE) passed. His birthday was the 2nd. Usually, I become melancholy and don't realize why, but this year wasn't the case. I realized last year things were affecting me less emotionally last year. I must say, I am pleased. Not that I forgot his birthday because I didn't. I'm pleased because I didn't realize it was coming let alone upon me. I'm hoping the same thing will happen on the 23rd of August (my mother's birthday).
I read something very funny today that I'd like to share. It was about a test of wills. A test to see who is the better male. Or, as SourBob put it, who is the man and who is the pussy.
PhillyKat at 11:56:00 PM | I changed the audio file on my main page too. See that navi box on the right? See where it says back to main? CLICK IT!!!
I added 2 buttons. One introducing you to the mind of Damon. The other to End of January, a Justin Timberlake site.
I also added Fear to my Wandering Mind section.
PhillyKat at 10:44:00 PM |
Instead of posting, I changed the audio file. Consider it a piece of advice from me (by way of Seawind) to you.
PhillyKat at 5:31:00 PM | I tried to blog again. Everything I start comes out as a scribble. What is a scribble? You would probably call them poems. I don't. They don't follow any form or meter that I learned. They follow my own timing. My own thoughts. My own speech. They are pieces of me, be they made up or pure reality, and I have never fit any pre-made mold.
I've got so much crap floating in my head it's scarey...stories, movies, videos, tv shows, even advertisements. All for my entertainment alone. One day I'll get them down maybe. One day.
Private Death
PhillyKat at 10:31:00 PM |
I started typing and what came out wasn't a blog entry in my opinion. I'll be updating A Wandering Mind as soon as I'm able to ftp (I have things going on, lol). Go to main page and click the link for A Wandering Mind. (If you don't see the link, I haven't been able to ftp. So no need to comment or email me about it.)
edit:
Loss for Words
PhillyKat at 9:41:00 PM | I've decided not to recant my NYC/Brooklyn experiences from Wednesday. Basically because the memories are fading (not really but I'd miss the funny bits like singing "Good Ship Lollipop" walking down Dey Street in line looking like we were in a parade or doing the bunny hop).
Today was very warm. I spent the entire day in the street somewhere between Philadelphia and Newark, DE. It wasn't a good day for driving because the crazies were out in full force. I-95 goes by the stadiums in south Philadelphia. The traffic was horrendous because Good Charlotte (ew) is performing tonight.
Last night, well between midnight and 1 am this morning, I was doing Friday Five. Blogger and/or iex went haywire on me and nothing posted. I'm going to retry eventually.
[edit: a good 2 hrs lata]
Friday 5:
1. Name one song you hate to admit you like.
"Look At Me" by Geri Halliwell
2. Name two songs that always make you cry.
"A Friend of Mine" by Ray Charles (not as much as it used to). I don't have a 2nd. Music rarely makes me cry.
3. Name three songs that turn you on.
Most songs that are meant to turn people on, don't do a thing for me...I rarely think they're sexy. Anyway this took a bit of looking.
"Worthy Of" by Justin Timberlake
"I Get Lonely" by Janet Jackson
"Melt With You" by Prince
4. Name four songs that always make you feel good.
"Lovely Day" by Bill Withers
"Sunshine On a Rainy Day" by Emma Bunton
"What I Am" by Edie Brickell and the New Bohemians
"Everybody's Got Their Something" by Nikka Costa
honorable mention: "No Rain" by Blind Melon,
5. Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
"Words" by Madonna
"Why Don't You Do Right" by Peggy Lee
Shubert's (I think) "Danse Macabre"
"Don't Play Me" by Prince
"Dream On" by Aerosmith
*at any given moment 1, 3, 4, 5 can change instantly*
PhillyKat at 10:20:00 PM | All day today I meant to type up yesterday's NYC's experience. But being that I am Queen of the Procrastinators, I did not. Shelby posted this majorly long survey. I've decided to do some if not most of it since this blog is supposed to aid in my unraveling. So, here goes.
Full Name: Puddintame. Ask me again, I'll tell you the same. You really didn't expect me to answer that did you? After all I am an enigma.
Nicknames: none ya.
Birthday: 6th of March
Age: Aquarius. Oh wait, did you mean that chronological thing?
Sign (Chinese & Zodiac): the intuitive, secretive, elusive, and sexy Pisces. My Chinese sign: "two nine nine you buy. Good Price." Alright, that was hilarious. Rude as hell (sorry) but funny. Guess you must not live in the right place. Honestly, I don't remember my Chinese zodiac. I think it maybe monkey or horse. Or are those my sisters?
Sex: Female
Location: Philadelphia, PA, USA
Height: 5'9"
Eye Color: Brown. (not light not dark not medium. medium light brown...lol)
Hair Color: dark red & brown
Shoe Size: hee!
Do you have any pets?: noper
Parents: deceased
Siblings (how many/age/name): 5: 3bros/52, 50, 46 and 2 sis/54, 47....I think I got those right. Dang they're old! I'm waaaaaay younger than my siblings. Most people think my sister is my mom. Sometimes, I wonder. lol
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?: boyfriend. unfortunately no
Do you have a crush?: on a real person? lol, no
What are your screen names?: Enigma, Kat, Sephora, "yada yada yada and whatever the hell else"
If you have a web page, what is the link?: Well, duh! In case you've opted never to go to my main page here ya go: Enigma's Conundrurm
What font/color/size do you use?: depends on what I'm looking for/ depends on what I'm doing/usually 12
Food: Italian.
Drink: water, -ades......when life hands me a citrus fruit, i'll make a refreshing drink, juice (esp fresh squeezed)
Book: none
Movie: No way for me to answer this.
Candy: Not big on candy but I like smarties a lot
Gum: none really.
TV Show: John Doe, Buffy
Actor: I don't have one.
Actress: Bette Davis
Web Site: I'm gonna plead the 5th on that one. Ain't gon get me to hurting feelings. *wink wink*
Disney Movie: The Littel Mermaid
Video Game: I don't play video games. Use to love me some ......uhhhhhh.....tempest. I think that was the name.
Soundtrack: West Side Story
Cartoon: Inu Yasha or Yuyu Hakusho or Reign: Legend of the Conqueror
Color: most shades of blue, black, and most shades of purple (esp lavendar)
Computer Font: I don't have one. I think there should be an Enigma's hand though. Should be completely illegible or atleast tough to decipher.
Ice Cream Flavor: How many times I gotta say I don't eat ice cream?!
Pizza Topping: none. i like tomato pies if its seasoned well. if not just gimme plain.
Guy's Name: David, Noah, Justin, Bo (yes Bo....shut up! not Boregard. just Bo), Xavier (never would do it), Vincent
Gal's Name: mine, Naomi, and a few others lol
Holiday: none
Magazine: none. not even TVGuide
Day: today? Thursday. in general? today
Music Group: not really into groups. there are maybe 2..dang I can only think of 1....I tolerate.
Place to eat: Chellie's (my sister)
Quotes: I don't really go around quoting people. but.....
"A man is only good in two positions: on his back or on his knees. Only then can he keep you truly satisfied."-- Zsa Zsa
"I'd like to kiss ya, but I just washed my hair. Bye" -- Bette Davis
"Bitch...Can I call you 'b' for short?" -- Justin Timberlake
"You must be out your rabid ass mind." -- Mi mama
"Yada Yada Yada and whatever the hell else" -- Martin Short
"You dun lost your nut." or some version there of -- Me
that's enough I think.
Song: whoooooa.......um.....first song to pop in my head "Worthy Of" by Justin Timberlake
Season: Spring
Shampoo: Pantene
CD/Album: Of all time? I havent one. At the moment? same answer.
Sport: To watch? Football and almost all Olympic events. To play? hee..u funny.
Who are your friends?: those with whom I am friends. duh!
What are your hobbies?: truly I don't have anything I consider a hobby, because I don't stick to anything for long periods.
What attracts you to the opposite sex?: intelligence, sense of humor, kindness/great heart, wit, charm/charisma, great personality, physical (height, nice guns (arms) and thighs, beautiful smile, nice lips), ability to listen and share
What do you want to be when you grow up?: when I grow up, maybe 2 or 3 or 4, I'll come knocking on your door.....wooo Shirley Temple mode. I'm back now. Happy and healthy
Stupidest thing you have done?: I've not listed them in order of stupidity so, I wouldn't know. Perhaps thinking filling this out was a good idea.
What one wish would you want to come true?: Being happy with my life, my surroundings, and having the love of my life to share it with
Whats your worst habit?: procrastination
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change?: procrastination/lack of motivation.
How many buddies are on your buddy list?: which one? doesnt matter too damn many. Gotta be like Tia and get to cutting
Do you hope to be married one day?: I hope to be mated. marriage brings the government into a union that is none of their damn business
What's your biggest fear?: dying unloved and alone
What really annoys you?: ahhhh pet peeve time....wooo ummm just one thing? liars. I HATE A LIAR!
What makes you happy?: I'm not quite sure because sometimes I don't know when I'm happy until its over. Good times/convo with good people. the perfect song to fit my mood right then or that moves me in some way. a movie that pulls me into it. a great joke. thinking. a walk. babies and children laughing and playing. seeing men with children.
What makes you sad?: child abuse. death & destruction. my family at times
Have you ever been in love?: No.
How many times have you said "I Love You" and meant it?: I don't know how to say I love you. (I didn't just write it. I meant it) It's very difficult thing for me to say, I'm getting better I think. So everytime I've said it, I've meant it.
Do you believe in love at first sight?: Not really.
Do you believe in fate?: yes
Is it possible for a long distance realtionship to work?: Depends on the people.
Has anyone ever broken your heart?: yes
Have you ever broken someone else's heart?: I don't believe so.
Have you ever cheated in a relationship?: no
Has anyone ever cheated on you in a relationship?: well define relationship. do backstabbing skank ass friends count? No? oh well then...nah.
Do you want to fall in love?: most definitely
If you could be in a relationship with anyone, who would it be?: oh c'mon! You mean like a real person walking down the street or a celebrity? You gotsta be off your nut if you think I'm gonna answer this one. No, I really have no bloody idea. Now, making some guy my babies' daddy is a dif subject all together. lmao
PhillyKat at 11:58:00 PM |
